Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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