You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
