we have officially lost it.
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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