I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
This is the high leading the old right now
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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