so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize