She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
