I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Randomize
