Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
