This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
You need a sexual gate keeper
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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