Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Randomize
