she was so not down for the gang bang
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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