Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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