He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
