Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
