i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
they're like a gay fantastic four
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
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