Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Mom said you looked used
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
