She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
