why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
