your parents love me but you hate me
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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