Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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