Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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