I bet he comes in French.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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