Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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