No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Randomize
