Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize
