Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Randomize
