drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
