Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Randomize
