Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
We are two peas in an std pod
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
