I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
