those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
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