I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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