have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Is this like a preordered booty call?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
