Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
