yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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