Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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