Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
