It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
