They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
