i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Randomize
