One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
