You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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