I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Maybe he injected his testicle?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize