glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize