THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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