Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize