Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
