Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Randomize
