Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
