; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
