I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize