Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
is wine microwaveable?
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
