was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize